I got to work the other morning and texted Sir. Something on my drive had reminded me of him, something random and nonsensical to anyone else. In of itself, the thing didn’t matter. But it made me smile and think of him, so I had to say something. I like letting him know he’s on my mind.
“I like to saturate your life,” he said.
I have this thing with certain words. I remember when I learned them, when they first became a part of my vocabulary. Sometimes it’s really specific. For example, I learned the word plethora in 3rd grade. My teacher found a way to use it nearly everyday and it just stuck with me. And now that I think about it, I’m pretty sure I learned placebo that year too…some cool older kid came in one day to experiment on us. They gave us different batches of cookies, supposedly with increasing amounts of salt. The fact that they were all exactly the same didn’t stop us from being parched as hell after eating the last batch. But I digress.
Other times my vocabulary memories are more vague. I remember learning a new word and thinking, “Yeah, that’s a good word. Descriptive. I’ll use that.” It may have been on a spelling list at one point or something, but I don’t know. I just remember that saturation is one of those words. It’s one of those words that I’m drawn to. It’s…tingly.
I’ve written before that I have hangups when trying to describe what our D/s is like. I definitely feel submissive. But I’m not sure how that comes across to someone outside of our relationship because we don’t really have the structure or protocol that seems to be typical of D/s. To me it’s just an energy exchange. That energy is incredibly powerful on its own, and personally, I don’t need a lot of structure to prove that it’s there. I like to think I come up with my own ways of demonstrating my submission that are more subtle and more creative. I think the same goes for how he expresses his dominance. To me, the biggest aspect of his dominance is just his presence. And despite the physical distance between us, he always finds ways to increase his presence in my life. I always feel him with me.
So I liked that he used that word. Saturate. Because that’s exactly what it feels like.
Sounds a lot like dominance to me.
(And before anyone says I missed the chance to relate saturation to wetness, of course I thought of that. Sometimes I like to keep my writing sophisticated and smut-free, ok?)