As you may know, one of my hobbies is psychoanalyzing complete strangers based off of a single message and then compiling multitudes of those incidents to draw assumptions about societal behavior. I’ll admit, I am hopeful that I’ll gain some grand poetic insight into humanity, but mostly I just do it for my own amusement.
This is one of my latest:
“i hope its not offensive…but how do i admire you as beauty w out upsetting your dom and paying you tribute”
It’s one of those rare ones that made me cock my head to the side, you know, like a puppy who doesn’t understand what’s going on in front of them.
I had some questions for this guy.
Do you think it’s offensive to admire someone? You come at it like “Is this ok? I’m about to purpose an idea and I need to make sure to give you a metaphorical safety net before I ask because you might not like what I have to offer.”
What did you mean by “admire you as beauty”? Was that a typo? Was it supposed to be “admire your beauty”? Or do you mean you want to admire me as beauty incarnate?
Why do you think that your behavior will automatically upset my Dom? What is it that you want to do to me that will render such a negative reaction from my partner?
Your thought structure is ambiguous. Is it supposed to be “How do I admire you, without upsetting your Dom, while still paying you tribute?” or “How do I admire you without upsetting your Dom and also without paying you tribute?”
What kind of tribute are you hoping to give? Are we talking about a cum tribute here? Do you think the only feasible way for you to show your admiration for me is to cum on a photo of me and then send it to me as proof?
I didn’t reply with all that. Maybe I should have. I may have gotten a clearer idea of what he was asking, instead of ending up more confused, which is what actually happened.
The rest of the conversation went like this:
Me: Is that a serious question?
Him: YES why…i want to worship you
Me: I mean, are you really asking how you can admire me without upsetting my Dom? Can you not think of a way to do that yourself?
Him: i meant is there a group set to that
Me: I don’t understand what you’re talking about
I did try a little bit there. But now there are more questions.
Do you think it was strange of me to want to question your proposal? Do you think it’s odd that someone would hesitate before just letting someone worship them?
Are you not going to acknowledge my confusion at all? Did you even take a moment to read back your first message and recognize how it may not have been understood correctly on my end?
How come, instead of answering my question, which was an attempt to get on the same page about what we’re actually talking about, you suddenly reframe your original question?
Are you asking if there’s literally a group, on Fetlife, designated for admiring me? Do you not know how to use a search bar? Are you asking me to find out if such group exists? Are you expecting me to do that work for you?
Or are you asking if I’m a fetish? Again, do you not know how to use a search bar? Also, did you not read my profile? Because I literally provide the link to my fetish page..?
I must know these things. These are the questions that keep me up at night, you know? I’m always thinking, “Why did that person do that thing? What was their point? What were they hoping to achieve?”
But…he hasn’t replied. Perhaps I’ll never know.